[In]dependence

I'm pretty used to being depended on. I seem to find that place naturally in a lot of my relationships. I'm really independent, and I think I rely on myself a lot, so I don't feel comfortable leaning on other people much. And I'm consistent, so maybe people find that comforting to have close. But I have one friend who I rely on 100%. It's been that way forever. I actually need her, and she's always been there. Just me and her.

I think she's ok without me. She can stand without me, she can rely on the people that are close to her, whether that's me or someone else. She's would miss me if I was gone, but she will function just fine and I feel like I'll have a harder time.

I don't need anyone, but her. I trust her, and only her. She knows me, completely. She gets me, and that's rare. She laughs at me, which is an acquired taste. We just fit. We work.

I don't really feel comfortable in that position. It's not a mutual dependence. It's a mutual happiness and love, but we take very different roles. It's vulnerable, to need and not be needed.

I don't think I like it. It scares me a little.