I want to be inside my favorite song.
I'm sitting somewhere where I don't want to be, doing something I don't want to do. But my ipod is in, and it's playing my favorite song and it feels so good. I just want to be consumed by the music, be totally washed over and covered in it. Lost in it, where there's nothing else going on. No body but me, no time, no plans, no destination.
I'd like to step inside the song. I think it would be black there, but a beautiful, deep, familiar and pleasing dark. The song is memorized, its turns and builds and breaks and waves. I have deemed it my favorite, given it a special place. Played it over and over again, in different situations, each time adding new meaning to the words or reassuring what has always rung true in them. It has won my heart over, for now at least. Everyone knows that favorite songs don't last long. Circumstances change, the song gets overplayed, a new singer comes along, a new favorite song. Eventually I will hear it again, and along with its being played, comes the emotions and memories from somewhere inside that are attached to it. I don't often like to look back. It's uncomfortable. It's a fortunate thing if I've managed to move on at all.
But for now, it brings only happiness and pleasure to my ears. If only the entire world would melt away, leaving me alone in the dark depth of the music I choose.
That's all I want right now.
If everything is Yours, everything is Yours.
I can let it go, it was never mine to hold.
